I recently became acquainted with Laura of Mommy Miracles, and I’m so glad I did. She’s the mother of two incredibly handsome little boys, an amazing photographer, and has been blogging for almost TEN years. She shares on her site that she met her husband through blogging, and has documented her wedding and births through blogging, which I think is incredible (I’ve only live tweeted one birth, darn it).
I love this recent post from Laura called Resolutions, because not only did she list her resolutions for the year at the END of January, but she really dug deep down to figure out what about her needed some work and what really needed to happen in 2013 (potty training, anyone?).
Her family lives up north, in Nova Scotia, but since I’ve “known” her, I’ve found that we have a lot in common. Plus, she recently organized an online book club called Moms Reading (#momsreading) that I’m excited to be a part of (and it’s not too late to join!). Laura is beautiful inside and out, and I’m honored to have her here today!
I was an overachiever in high school. Really, I was an overachiever all throughout my school years. If you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always had an answer.
“Teacher”
“Architect”
“Writer”
“Doctor”
Regardless of my answer, I was sure that I would be that person sometime in the future. And I worked hard towards my goal.
In grade two I focused on getting good grades and I ‘taught’ my little sister with old text books at the blackboard in our bedroom.
In grade six I focused on getting good grades and I drew out house plans on graphing paper on the weekends.
In grade ten I focused on getting good grades and I filled journals and wrote novels and passed in duo-tangs of my poems for extra credit.
In grade twelve I focused on my grades and I cried over physics because if I was struggling in that class, maybe I wouldn’t get in to med school.
In my head there were twenty possible jobs to be had and ten of them would make my parents proud. I would go to school, get a job, make loads of money, and live a happy adulthood with my awesome family.
Life doesn’t always go as expected, does it?
I went to university for my undergrad and struggled to pay for it. I put off going to teacher’s college while I waited to finish paying off my undergrad. When it was paid off I was getting married and the teaching environment was completely toxic – I could go to school with very little chance of ever standing in front of a classroom. So, I put of that dream. I found a respectable office job and had babies, all the while wondering if I would ever do something that meant something to me.
…All the while wondering if I had failed at adulthood.
Then I looked at my two precious little boys that I helped bring into this world – their little moppy-haired heads and their impish smiles. How they grow and reach and discover the world as if they could own it. And they are beautiful. They have the world at their fingertips. They mean the world to me.
I pray I have many years left on this adulthood journey. I still feel like there are so many opportunities left to discover. But I’ve stopped worrying about what I will be. I just be. I just focus on what I love and I do those things. And somehow, I’ll pave out a way. I’ll lead my children until they can choose their own paths, and I’ll redefine what success means to me.
I wanted to be a teacher and now I sing the A-B-Cs.
I wanted to be an architect and now I create a home.
I wanted to be a doctor and now I kiss away ouchies.
I wanted to be a writer and now I am telling my story.
Get to know Laura and her family on her blog, Mommy Miracles, on Facebook, on Twitter @LauraORourke, on her photography page, and on Instagram @lauralorourke.
I love the last 4 lines, Laura.
And that picture of Cameron and Gavin.
Also, TEN years of blogging?
Dinosaur. 🙂
Thank you Alison. And yup! 10 years. Well, almost 10 years. More like nine. But I started as a vague-blogging teenager, so a lot has changed in those ten years. 🙂
Oh that last line, girl.
The whole post is phenomenal, but that last line – wowsa.
{Love seeing the two of you here together!}
xo
Thank you Galit! Your praise means so much! 🙂 (And I loved being here with Greta!)
Some dreams are realized in ways we didn't expect, aren't they? Love that photo of your little ones!
Absolutely! It always surprises me how some things work out totally different than I expected, but usually better.
[…] Expectations where bloggers talk about an expectation and then share how it all really turned out. Today I am talking about my expectation of who I thought I would be in adulthood. This has actually been something I’ve been meaning to write for a long time and it sits […]
Thanks for sharing this, what a wonderful way to see dreams being fulfilled in ways one didn't expect.
Thanks Christopher. And thank you for commenting! 🙂 Sometimes it is even nice to just write something like this so that I can realize that my dreams have been fulfilled in ways I didn't expect.
gorgeous! I love that you found your dream job through your family.
Me too! I just have to remember that this is my dream job sometimes!
I think a lot of us who put family before career will connect so much with this post. I have to constantly push away feelings of "failed adulthood" even though I am fiercely proud of my family. I am looking forward to hearing more of your story, I love how you tell it,
Thank you so much Poppy. It is comforting to hear that others feel this same way. When I look into the world, I either see women who have it all (Great job, beautiful family) or who choose to not work (Stay at home Mom, beautiful family) and I just feel like I don't fit into either category. I feel like I have to work but don't feel like my job is everything I've always imagined it to be.
Oh Laura, I love the way you wrote this and the feelings behind it. It was good that you had such wonderful goals when you were younger because they still led you to where you are now. And your family is beautiful. Wonderful post! xo
Thank you Elaine. I love that perspective – that I didn't fail, but my goals still helped to bring me to this current situation. Sometimes it is so hard to feel like I am successful in light of all I thought when I was growing up. But then I realize how awesome my kids are and if this isn't success, I don't know what is.
re-framing goals from your new perspective…a lovely post indeed. I shudder to think of what my HS self would think of me now; she had her head very firmly planted in the clouds and I certainly don't.
I have a sister in her last year of high school. I wish I could just shove all of these life lessons I've learned into her head as she plans for university.
Oh yes, love the last lines! The whole idea of ambition and identity is so complicated, but I love the idea of just BEing.
Thank you Robin! For me, the just BEing is closely tied to doing what I love. I realized that I can be happy with who I am if I do what I love.
It's a great reminder that we don't always live the life we imagined, but we do live the life we create!
Yes! The thing is, sometimes we don't realize the outcome we are creating. Sometimes we think we are going in one direction when we are actually going in another. I have needed to realize that this other direction is actually the right one! 🙂
Laura I love this post…it's hard not to get caught up in the what ifs…and to just be!
It is hard. Those what ifs are nasty nasty things. I fall into their trap often.
I read the last four lines, and then tears….happy ones 🙂
My sister has a saying: The grass is greener where you water it. I need to remember that just because I'm not living the exact life I envisioned, it's perfect for me and my family, and I need to water it more so it will continue to grow and thrive.
The grass is greener where you water it. That's awesome. Thank you for sharing it. I definitely need to remember that! It is so applicable!
Amazing last 4 sentences! I loved the whole thing about it! And I am so excited for the book club!
Thank you Audrey! And I'm so glad you're participating in the book club!
As I often say in auditing, it is all about perspective. YOU have a beautiful one.
Thank you Jennifer. Sometimes writing helps me come to terms with my perspective. I'll try to remember this one. 🙂
So hard to let ourselves just be and not feel the weight of expectation–ours and others'. But sometimes the things we didn't plan on turn out to be the best things and the best life we could have.
Isn't it funny how that happens? All the time I am shocked at how life turned out entirely different and entirely better than I expected. I just have to open my eyes to seeing it that way.
Those last few lines are just perfect! And 10 years of blogging? You're a rock star!
Almost 10. I started when I was 17 and am turning 27 this month. It is crazy when you think about it, but I also started off doing the typical vague-blogging teenager thing, so I prefer to NOT think about it. 😉
Laura – you have this amazing way with words. You put so many things into perspective and it always resonates so deeply in my own heart 🙂 Thank you again!!! You are amazing girl!!!
Candice, your words mean so much to me. Thank you.
This is so beautifully written and that last paragraph… so expresses how I feel and want to feel!
Thank you so much. I hope you and I both continue to feel this way in the days to come.
The feeling of being able to find your dream job is something that you should celebrate because
that's where you belong and that's what makes you happy, isn't it?
Awww! This is sweet. I wanted to be a teacher, and wow! I've spent the last 13.5 years teaching in and out of the classroom! 😉 Great guest post, Greta!
This said it all, thank you so much for your simple yet very honest post! I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up!